Today, Yesterday and Tomorrow--Chapter 3--Words Not Spoken
Posted: Fri Oct 10, 2003 4:34 am
Disclaimer: Full Metal Panic! belongs to Shoji Gatou.
A/N: My one lapse into Japanese (so far). Otoosan=father (formal), imooto=younger sister (informal), musume=daughter (humble)
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Today, Yesterday and Tomorrow
Chapter 3--Words Not Spoken
By Samantha
Looking down at the mission report in her lap, Captain Teletha Testarossa thought idly to herself about a certain sergeant, the report momentarily forgotten. Lieutenant Commander Kalinin’s polite cough brought her attention back to the report. She was thinking about the previous day, and how he had calmed her, and how starkly different he looked today. She pulled on her near-white braid nervously. “Enough of that, for the time being” she chided herself. “Commander Kalinin, I have to question your judgment in keeping the Urtz team in Tokyo to guard Miss Chidori. Gauron is dead; the threat is gone.”
The much older man shook his head. “Captain, he may not have been the only threat. Remember, one of our own leaked him the data to allow him to hijack the Tuatha de Danaan. We need to remove that leak before we can presume to believe the Whispered are safe for a time. Until that is done, I suggest the Urtz team remain in place for several reasons. First, they are the best at what they do. Second, they are able to work with Miss Chidori. It would be unwise to change something that is working as well as the Urtz team’s rapport with their charge. Third, Sergeant Sagara needs more experience in a conventional environment to improve his abilities to be a more versatile member of Mithril.”
She sighed; realizing her Chief of Staff outfoxed her with logic, while all she had was the emotional desire to be around one Sagara Sousuke. At least he had not rubbed in the fact that Chidori Kaname had neutralized the threat of Gauron, with Sousuke’s aid.
***
Kaname rested her eyes on the student behind her and sighed. The only change was his attempt to hide something was wrong. What he hadn’t counted on was how well she knew him, and how much his eyes gave lie to his outward appearance. Even Shinji, who often was too wrapped up in his AS magazines to notice much else, commented to her something was wrong with Sousuke.
What could she do to shake him out of his self-induced isolation? He had returned to following her at a distance home from school, being her constant shadow. She wouldn't have been surprised if he'd sleep as close as he could to her apartment. Luckily, she knew Melissa would not let him. Maybe she should save Melissa the trouble, and offer Sousuke a futon in the living room. She blushed, knowing she would steal out of her room at night to watch him sleep. He seemed much more innocent and well, normal, while at rest.
She knew that Sousuke insisted to his fellow Mithril members to maintain their vigilance in the task of protecting her, or at least that’s what Kurtz told her, when he was not making a good natured pass at one of her friends. Oddly enough, Kaname idly noted, it seemed she was off limits to the other sergeant.
Maybe she could surprise him with a boxed lunch, instead of the military rations he normally brought? She shook her head, thinking that would cheer her up if she failed an exam, not for something as seemingly earth shattering as what happened to him. Show him the results of her lessons? Perhaps that might work. Maybe he would even teach her some of what Melissa was teaching her, though the other woman told her Sousuke’s style was much less refined, more rough and tumble, what he learned to stay alive. The other woman hinted that Sousuke would teach her to fight dirty. For some reason being in that close a proximity to him made her want to smile. No, she agreed with Melissa that telling Sousuke about her studies with Melissa and Kurtz at this point would be counterproductive. She laughed as a sudden idea hit her. Get him drunk on sake, and convince him to tell her of his problems? She knew his fellow teammates would support that idea, if she would photograph him inebriated. She decided to go with that plan. It would have the most chance of success.
She guiltily looked up to meet her teacher’s harsh gaze. He had obviously noticed her distraction.
“Miss Chidori, do you care to tell the class what is so funny?”
She refused to warn Sousuke what was in store for him in several days, so her mind raced to find something amusing. A moment later she answered, “A story Kyouko told me, though you have to know her family to understand it.”
He nodded. “Now let’s return to the lecture.” The lecture was on Japanese history during the Meiji Restoration. Again the teacher looked at her, obviously singling her out after her earlier lapse in attention. “Miss Chidori, what were some of the reforms brought about by the Meiji restoration? Simply give me a list.”
She smiled. She could easily answer this after last night’s tutoring session with Sousuke. It seemed the only time he returned to his not so old self was when they discussed the changes in the military during that time. Several sessions earlier, he had complained that his textbook did not contain enough details on that subject. “Sensei, during that time, there were changes in the education system, the military, religion, the political system, trade with other nations and the conversion from the Shogunate to the rule of Emperor Meiji.”
He nodded and continued the lecture, until it was time to return home. As Sousuke had to remain late to clean up after the semi-regular explosions he caused, Kurtz was escorting her home today. At least he walked with her, instead of fifteen feet behind her. Even better, she could obtain permission to carry out her plan. Hearing it he grinned, and assured her Melissa would authorize it. “Kurtz, now how to get him to drink it? I’ve never seen him even consider it.”
The blond grinned, and answered, “Just order him to.” He laughed and elbowed her in the ribs. “What man would disobey a woman as beautiful as you?” Even if Kaname harisened him, it was all in a day’s work for him, considering the treatment he received on a regular basis from Melissa.
He grinned and pulled Kaname to the Mithril agents’ safe house, with its unpacked boxes in the hallway, various pieces of surveillance equipment neatly stacked under the window, the trash and pile of beer cans in one corner and the rickety chairs around the table. Kurtz rummaged around in a cupboard, pulling out a bottle of Johnny Walker Red Label, still in the box, handing it to Kaname with an overdone flourish. “My contribution to the operation. I was saving it for when Sis says yes, but ...” He grinned, “This is probably worth it, though. Especially if we have pictures.” He did not tell her they already would have pictures. They bugged her apartment, though he was forbidden to watch that particular monitor, but...
Kaname nodded and looked at the door, as it creaked, announcing Melissa’s entrance. She was still in her AS suit, a grin plastered across her face, the cigarette absent for once. “Did I hear that conversation correctly? This is your idea and not Kurtz’s?” After Kaname’s nod, the major sergeant continued, “I never thought you had it in you, Kaname. Though Kurtz is right, it will probably be well worth watching.” They both grinned and pushed Kaname out the door, promising to send Sousuke her way when he returned.
A short time later, a confused looking Sousuke knocked on the door. When Kaname answered it, he asked her, “Is it not early for our study session, Chidori?” His gray eyes were questioning, slightly. Though a small change, it gave Kaname hope her plan would work, and not require the entire bottle. Maybe Kurtz would need it to celebrate with, one of these days. In an odd way, she hoped he would. She gestured to her protector to sit at the table.
Not responding to Sousuke’s question, she simply found a glass and put several ice cubes in it, and poured some of the Johnny’s into it, before setting it in front of Sousuke. She sat across from him.
He looked at it oddly and smelled it. “You received this from where? It goes against regulations for me to drink it.”
She gave him a saccharine smile. “Even if I order you to drink it, sergeant?” She hoped the combination of orders and his rank would prompt him to agree.
Looking like a deer caught in the headlights, all he could do was grunt noncommittally and stare at the glass with its amber colored liquid.
“Do I have to report you to the major sergeant for unwillingness to follow orders?” Her smile became a grin.
Mutely, he shook his head and downed the scotch in one swallow, his face contorting in surprise at the unwonted taste in his mouth. Kaname refilled the glass and with a tilt of her head, indicated he repeat the process. He did so, with a minimum of disagreement.
Kaname waited several minutes to see how the alcohol was affecting him, giving him enough to get him a bit past tipsy. She had a glass herself for good measure.
She looked at him and asked him, “Something is bothering you, Sousuke. Out with it.”
He answered with a slur, describing his vision first. “Chidori, I could feel every kick they could give me. I wished I would die, so the pain would end. These memories were distracting me from my duties. Above all else, I am to protect you. How could I do that while a victim of mere memories?” His eyes took on a fevered look, and he poured himself another glass and finished it in two swallows. “How, Chidori?” Sousuke barely remained in control enough to not say how much she meant to him. Instead he explained the pain he felt at failing his mother and sister. “I promised my father I would protect them. Instead I watched the soldiers butcher them, including my baby sister. I failed and both of them died.” He paused and reached for the bottle before continuing in a hoarse whisper. “I promised to protect you, Chidori. I can not lose you that way, either.”
Hearing his reasoning in addition to the alcohol, Kaname began crying softly at his dedication to her and his long dead family. She shook her head and told him in a shaky whisper, “Thank you, Sousuke.”
Seeing her tears, he told her, “Do not cry for me, Kaname.” He slipped and used her personal name instead of her family name, a first for him. Sousuke tried to wipe the tears away, but inebriated as he was, he missed and instead brushed her lips with his fingertips. She took advantage of the moment and kissed them, gaining a confused look from Sousuke.
She smiled and murmured, “A kiss, Sousuke. To repay you for everything.” She paused. “Since meeting you, Sousuke, you have been the calm in the storm my life has become. You made all of those fearful moments a little less scary for me by your quiet confidence. Who told me that we could do anything together?” Gently she continued, “You not telling me what was bothering you stopped us from doing anything. Did you know that you scared me when you became the cold Sousuke you originally were?” She leaned closer to him, “Will you return to the Sagara Sousuke I saw you develop into over time?” She did not add, “The Sousuke I fell in love with.”
He looked at her, about ready to cry himself. Looking into her earthen brown eyes, he smiled tentatively at her a bit. “We never did catch the big one, did we, Chidori?”
Kaname laughed whole-heartedly and practically leapt over the table to hug him, relieved to see a smile from him. She pressed herself against him, overjoyed at his behavior, at least for the moment. She knew it could not last -- he would explode the shoeboxes again, or cause some other crisis she would have to defuse with the student council president. Pushing such thoughts from her mind, the blue haired woman simply enjoyed the moment and the sense of security being in Sousuke’s presence brought. He protected her, and she protected him when she could.
In shock, he simply held still, drunkenly wishing he had either listened to Kurtz more, or had a manual for dealing with inexplicable women. Her behavior did not exactly worry him, and he rather enjoyed her kissing his knuckles, though it would take a few more drinks for him to admit that to her. He smiled at the thought of another kiss, some other day, if he could remember tonight in the morning.
An odd feeling washed over him, and he “heard” Kaname saying his name, almost as if she were in that machine on the Tuatha de Danaan.
Before he could say anything to his companion, he heard the door open. Attempting to face the unexpected danger, his motion was unexpectedly upset between the alcohol and Kaname clutching him. He was unable to even draw any weapon, Kaname pinning his arms. He heard her saying two words over and over again. “otoosan” and “imooto.”
Sousuke looked over his shoulder to see a man that strongly resembled Kaname, and a younger girl with less of a resemblance. The meaning of Kaname’s words dawned on his slower than usual mind. This must be her father and younger sister, whom he had seen in photos decorating the public area of her apartment. Her sister seemed to take after their late mother.
Kaname’s father’s eyes surveyed the scene -- his daughter hugging a strange boy her own age tightly, and the half empty bottle of alcohol. His words were slow and reasoned, anger barely kept in check, “Musume, you better have a good explanation for everything. It took Kyouko writing me to find out about the ‘excitement’ in your life. The plane for your school trip was hijacked? You were taken hostage? Kyouko has been known to exaggerate a little, but not when things were important. And somehow a classmate named ‘Sagara Sousuke’ was involved?” He gestured around the room. “Is there some announcement you plan to make?” Kaname blushed, though for the life of him, Sousuke could not determine why. Apparently, it was time for negotiations, thought the soldier.
A/N: My one lapse into Japanese (so far). Otoosan=father (formal), imooto=younger sister (informal), musume=daughter (humble)
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Today, Yesterday and Tomorrow
Chapter 3--Words Not Spoken
By Samantha
Looking down at the mission report in her lap, Captain Teletha Testarossa thought idly to herself about a certain sergeant, the report momentarily forgotten. Lieutenant Commander Kalinin’s polite cough brought her attention back to the report. She was thinking about the previous day, and how he had calmed her, and how starkly different he looked today. She pulled on her near-white braid nervously. “Enough of that, for the time being” she chided herself. “Commander Kalinin, I have to question your judgment in keeping the Urtz team in Tokyo to guard Miss Chidori. Gauron is dead; the threat is gone.”
The much older man shook his head. “Captain, he may not have been the only threat. Remember, one of our own leaked him the data to allow him to hijack the Tuatha de Danaan. We need to remove that leak before we can presume to believe the Whispered are safe for a time. Until that is done, I suggest the Urtz team remain in place for several reasons. First, they are the best at what they do. Second, they are able to work with Miss Chidori. It would be unwise to change something that is working as well as the Urtz team’s rapport with their charge. Third, Sergeant Sagara needs more experience in a conventional environment to improve his abilities to be a more versatile member of Mithril.”
She sighed; realizing her Chief of Staff outfoxed her with logic, while all she had was the emotional desire to be around one Sagara Sousuke. At least he had not rubbed in the fact that Chidori Kaname had neutralized the threat of Gauron, with Sousuke’s aid.
***
Kaname rested her eyes on the student behind her and sighed. The only change was his attempt to hide something was wrong. What he hadn’t counted on was how well she knew him, and how much his eyes gave lie to his outward appearance. Even Shinji, who often was too wrapped up in his AS magazines to notice much else, commented to her something was wrong with Sousuke.
What could she do to shake him out of his self-induced isolation? He had returned to following her at a distance home from school, being her constant shadow. She wouldn't have been surprised if he'd sleep as close as he could to her apartment. Luckily, she knew Melissa would not let him. Maybe she should save Melissa the trouble, and offer Sousuke a futon in the living room. She blushed, knowing she would steal out of her room at night to watch him sleep. He seemed much more innocent and well, normal, while at rest.
She knew that Sousuke insisted to his fellow Mithril members to maintain their vigilance in the task of protecting her, or at least that’s what Kurtz told her, when he was not making a good natured pass at one of her friends. Oddly enough, Kaname idly noted, it seemed she was off limits to the other sergeant.
Maybe she could surprise him with a boxed lunch, instead of the military rations he normally brought? She shook her head, thinking that would cheer her up if she failed an exam, not for something as seemingly earth shattering as what happened to him. Show him the results of her lessons? Perhaps that might work. Maybe he would even teach her some of what Melissa was teaching her, though the other woman told her Sousuke’s style was much less refined, more rough and tumble, what he learned to stay alive. The other woman hinted that Sousuke would teach her to fight dirty. For some reason being in that close a proximity to him made her want to smile. No, she agreed with Melissa that telling Sousuke about her studies with Melissa and Kurtz at this point would be counterproductive. She laughed as a sudden idea hit her. Get him drunk on sake, and convince him to tell her of his problems? She knew his fellow teammates would support that idea, if she would photograph him inebriated. She decided to go with that plan. It would have the most chance of success.
She guiltily looked up to meet her teacher’s harsh gaze. He had obviously noticed her distraction.
“Miss Chidori, do you care to tell the class what is so funny?”
She refused to warn Sousuke what was in store for him in several days, so her mind raced to find something amusing. A moment later she answered, “A story Kyouko told me, though you have to know her family to understand it.”
He nodded. “Now let’s return to the lecture.” The lecture was on Japanese history during the Meiji Restoration. Again the teacher looked at her, obviously singling her out after her earlier lapse in attention. “Miss Chidori, what were some of the reforms brought about by the Meiji restoration? Simply give me a list.”
She smiled. She could easily answer this after last night’s tutoring session with Sousuke. It seemed the only time he returned to his not so old self was when they discussed the changes in the military during that time. Several sessions earlier, he had complained that his textbook did not contain enough details on that subject. “Sensei, during that time, there were changes in the education system, the military, religion, the political system, trade with other nations and the conversion from the Shogunate to the rule of Emperor Meiji.”
He nodded and continued the lecture, until it was time to return home. As Sousuke had to remain late to clean up after the semi-regular explosions he caused, Kurtz was escorting her home today. At least he walked with her, instead of fifteen feet behind her. Even better, she could obtain permission to carry out her plan. Hearing it he grinned, and assured her Melissa would authorize it. “Kurtz, now how to get him to drink it? I’ve never seen him even consider it.”
The blond grinned, and answered, “Just order him to.” He laughed and elbowed her in the ribs. “What man would disobey a woman as beautiful as you?” Even if Kaname harisened him, it was all in a day’s work for him, considering the treatment he received on a regular basis from Melissa.
He grinned and pulled Kaname to the Mithril agents’ safe house, with its unpacked boxes in the hallway, various pieces of surveillance equipment neatly stacked under the window, the trash and pile of beer cans in one corner and the rickety chairs around the table. Kurtz rummaged around in a cupboard, pulling out a bottle of Johnny Walker Red Label, still in the box, handing it to Kaname with an overdone flourish. “My contribution to the operation. I was saving it for when Sis says yes, but ...” He grinned, “This is probably worth it, though. Especially if we have pictures.” He did not tell her they already would have pictures. They bugged her apartment, though he was forbidden to watch that particular monitor, but...
Kaname nodded and looked at the door, as it creaked, announcing Melissa’s entrance. She was still in her AS suit, a grin plastered across her face, the cigarette absent for once. “Did I hear that conversation correctly? This is your idea and not Kurtz’s?” After Kaname’s nod, the major sergeant continued, “I never thought you had it in you, Kaname. Though Kurtz is right, it will probably be well worth watching.” They both grinned and pushed Kaname out the door, promising to send Sousuke her way when he returned.
A short time later, a confused looking Sousuke knocked on the door. When Kaname answered it, he asked her, “Is it not early for our study session, Chidori?” His gray eyes were questioning, slightly. Though a small change, it gave Kaname hope her plan would work, and not require the entire bottle. Maybe Kurtz would need it to celebrate with, one of these days. In an odd way, she hoped he would. She gestured to her protector to sit at the table.
Not responding to Sousuke’s question, she simply found a glass and put several ice cubes in it, and poured some of the Johnny’s into it, before setting it in front of Sousuke. She sat across from him.
He looked at it oddly and smelled it. “You received this from where? It goes against regulations for me to drink it.”
She gave him a saccharine smile. “Even if I order you to drink it, sergeant?” She hoped the combination of orders and his rank would prompt him to agree.
Looking like a deer caught in the headlights, all he could do was grunt noncommittally and stare at the glass with its amber colored liquid.
“Do I have to report you to the major sergeant for unwillingness to follow orders?” Her smile became a grin.
Mutely, he shook his head and downed the scotch in one swallow, his face contorting in surprise at the unwonted taste in his mouth. Kaname refilled the glass and with a tilt of her head, indicated he repeat the process. He did so, with a minimum of disagreement.
Kaname waited several minutes to see how the alcohol was affecting him, giving him enough to get him a bit past tipsy. She had a glass herself for good measure.
She looked at him and asked him, “Something is bothering you, Sousuke. Out with it.”
He answered with a slur, describing his vision first. “Chidori, I could feel every kick they could give me. I wished I would die, so the pain would end. These memories were distracting me from my duties. Above all else, I am to protect you. How could I do that while a victim of mere memories?” His eyes took on a fevered look, and he poured himself another glass and finished it in two swallows. “How, Chidori?” Sousuke barely remained in control enough to not say how much she meant to him. Instead he explained the pain he felt at failing his mother and sister. “I promised my father I would protect them. Instead I watched the soldiers butcher them, including my baby sister. I failed and both of them died.” He paused and reached for the bottle before continuing in a hoarse whisper. “I promised to protect you, Chidori. I can not lose you that way, either.”
Hearing his reasoning in addition to the alcohol, Kaname began crying softly at his dedication to her and his long dead family. She shook her head and told him in a shaky whisper, “Thank you, Sousuke.”
Seeing her tears, he told her, “Do not cry for me, Kaname.” He slipped and used her personal name instead of her family name, a first for him. Sousuke tried to wipe the tears away, but inebriated as he was, he missed and instead brushed her lips with his fingertips. She took advantage of the moment and kissed them, gaining a confused look from Sousuke.
She smiled and murmured, “A kiss, Sousuke. To repay you for everything.” She paused. “Since meeting you, Sousuke, you have been the calm in the storm my life has become. You made all of those fearful moments a little less scary for me by your quiet confidence. Who told me that we could do anything together?” Gently she continued, “You not telling me what was bothering you stopped us from doing anything. Did you know that you scared me when you became the cold Sousuke you originally were?” She leaned closer to him, “Will you return to the Sagara Sousuke I saw you develop into over time?” She did not add, “The Sousuke I fell in love with.”
He looked at her, about ready to cry himself. Looking into her earthen brown eyes, he smiled tentatively at her a bit. “We never did catch the big one, did we, Chidori?”
Kaname laughed whole-heartedly and practically leapt over the table to hug him, relieved to see a smile from him. She pressed herself against him, overjoyed at his behavior, at least for the moment. She knew it could not last -- he would explode the shoeboxes again, or cause some other crisis she would have to defuse with the student council president. Pushing such thoughts from her mind, the blue haired woman simply enjoyed the moment and the sense of security being in Sousuke’s presence brought. He protected her, and she protected him when she could.
In shock, he simply held still, drunkenly wishing he had either listened to Kurtz more, or had a manual for dealing with inexplicable women. Her behavior did not exactly worry him, and he rather enjoyed her kissing his knuckles, though it would take a few more drinks for him to admit that to her. He smiled at the thought of another kiss, some other day, if he could remember tonight in the morning.
An odd feeling washed over him, and he “heard” Kaname saying his name, almost as if she were in that machine on the Tuatha de Danaan.
Before he could say anything to his companion, he heard the door open. Attempting to face the unexpected danger, his motion was unexpectedly upset between the alcohol and Kaname clutching him. He was unable to even draw any weapon, Kaname pinning his arms. He heard her saying two words over and over again. “otoosan” and “imooto.”
Sousuke looked over his shoulder to see a man that strongly resembled Kaname, and a younger girl with less of a resemblance. The meaning of Kaname’s words dawned on his slower than usual mind. This must be her father and younger sister, whom he had seen in photos decorating the public area of her apartment. Her sister seemed to take after their late mother.
Kaname’s father’s eyes surveyed the scene -- his daughter hugging a strange boy her own age tightly, and the half empty bottle of alcohol. His words were slow and reasoned, anger barely kept in check, “Musume, you better have a good explanation for everything. It took Kyouko writing me to find out about the ‘excitement’ in your life. The plane for your school trip was hijacked? You were taken hostage? Kyouko has been known to exaggerate a little, but not when things were important. And somehow a classmate named ‘Sagara Sousuke’ was involved?” He gestured around the room. “Is there some announcement you plan to make?” Kaname blushed, though for the life of him, Sousuke could not determine why. Apparently, it was time for negotiations, thought the soldier.
