[FIC] Gang and Girl Visit Hinata: Havoc Ensues (part four)

[dd]

Kaname and Naru talk, as do Keitaro and Sousuke. Mutsumi is as wise as always. Kurz approaches the target. Shiro thinks about dinner. Motoko wrestles with doubt.

Damn that Sousuke!!! Kaname muttered to herself for the umpteenth time. Melissa’s description of the Darwin Awards hadn’t distracted her. If anything, each insane act made her think more and more about Sousuke. Attach a rocket booster to your car? No big deal! Try jumping off a cliff, hanging onto a balloon, a girl in your arms. Attempt to stop a train by the power of thought? No biggee! How about jumping out of a speeding train merely out of ‘coincidence.’ And what’s the big deal about tap dancing on an armed land mine? That IDIOT kept stepping on her heart every time he failed to take notice of her or respond to her hints. THAT was dangerous. Damn that Sousuke!!!

Kaname caught herself. What was she thinking? Sousuke was her guard, her protector. Nothing more. He was an imposition, an albatross, a major pain in the posterior. Yes…now that she had her head on straight again , she felt much better. She continued to follow Naru towards her room. It wouldn’t hurt to get to know her better. It was Melissa’s and Sousuke’s duty to worry about the more important stuff. Kurz’ too, if he ever showed up again.

“You were thinking about him, weren’t you?” A smiling and buxom brunette had walked up beside Kaname without her knowing it.

“W-what?”

“You were thinking about that boy you came with. I can tell….” He hand was held up near the edge of her face, and strands of her hair arched out away from her head.

“No…I…”

“He’s really cute. You’re very lucky. You make a very nice couple.”

“Look…he…” Whatever Kaname was going to say was interrupted by Naru, now leaning out of the door to her room.

“Over here, Kaname. Mutsumi, what are you doing here?” Naru looked puzzled.

“You look very familiar. Have we met before?” Mutsumi asked Naru.

Naru looked shocked, then exasperated. “Mutsumi! We met in Kyoto. Nearly died together with Keitaro in that raft. You gave me my first kiss. We study together…any of this ring a bell…?”

“Yes…did you say your name is Keitaro?” At that moment, Mutsumi slowly fell to the ground as if she were on a low gravity planet.

“Is she alright?” Kaname asked, concerned. “Should we call a doctor or something?”

“Yes, she’ll be fine. That’s just one of her endearing characteristics, the things that make her popular with the fans. Large breasts. Love of watermelons. Ability to talk to turtles. Ditsy attitude. Competition with me to see who the Promise Girl is. We’ve gotten used to all that.” Naru looked down fondly at the unconscious Mutsumi.

Naru and Kaname carried Mutsumi into the room, placing her underneath Naru’s heated table, in a sitting position, head laying on her arms.

“What were you two talking about?” Naru asked, picking up a large yellow stuffed animal.

“What?” Kaname stared at the old toy.

“What were you and Mutsumi talking about in the hallway? That boy you came with?” Naru noticed that Kaname was staring at the Mr. Chupi doll. “Oh, you must think that it’s silly for someone my age to be so attached to a doll. But I’ve had this fellow for a long time,”

“No, I don’t think that’s silly. I have a Bonta-Kun doll that I still hug sometimes. It’s just that it looks familiar. I can swear I’ve seen that before. Somewhere. Some time.”

“That’s right! Haruka said that you had been here before. Maybe you were here at the same time as Mutsumi….and Keitaro.” Naru was smiling, but Kaname caught a look of growing concern in her eyes.

“Maybe” Kaname said. “But you don’t have to worry. I doubt I was his Promise Girl. And even if I were, I wouldn’t want him to keep that promise to me. I am looking forward to going to that university some day, but for my own reasons.”

“What are you saying? Do you think I’m worried about who Keitaro made the promise to? That’s so ridiculous. I already made a promise to someone else. To someone older…more worldly…a great deal more handsome…” Naru sounded very convincing. Kaname didn’t buy it.

“Who is very fond of you, but not romantically inclined?” Kaname watched naru blush. “Look, I’m not going to try and trick a confession out of you. There are plenty of other people who can do that….I’d keep an eye on Shinobu and Mutsumi in that regard, if I were you.” Kaname sighed. “I have my hands full as it is. I’m not looking to add another clueless shadow.”

Kaname expected to see Naru look somewhat relieved. Instead, the young lady put her face into her hands, sitting quietly. Her shoulders shook ever so slightly.

“Naru, are you alright? Did I say something to upset you?” Kaname was concerned.

“No. Yes. It’s not your fault. This is so hard on me….” Naru paused, looking to see if Mutsumi was asleep. “He’s a pervert. At least that’s what the serendipity of events leads me to believe. He’s a coward and a weakling in some things, but steadfast and kind. And look at him! Short. Scrawny. Dorky looking. It’s going to be some time before he gets tanned, acts a bit more mature and self-confident, or gets a pair of glasses like Seta’s. How can they make my character fall in love with someone like THAT!” Naru lifted her head from her hands, a tear running down from her eye. “Sousuke…his character animation is SO MUCH better….”

“He cares about you, doesn’t he?” Kaname was envious.

“Yes…but…”

“He works very hard at his goal, but still finds time to laugh and have fun with you…”

“Yes…but he…”

“He has a heart, worries about how other people feel, and tries to help them.”

“That’s just Keitaro…we…”

“Even though it’s a harem show, and some things have to happen by definition, he will truly and honestly win the love and friendship of every woman here, won’t he?” Kaname was very glad she was NOT in a harem show. She had enough trouble with Te-…that girl.

“That’s what will make it so tough to want to give up the fun we have and hope for something more. There is so much to risk…”

“He probably dreams about being with you…kissing you…I bet he gets nosebleeds…”

“Yes. That pervert!”

“Uh huh. Would you really him to be any different? He notices when you wear a bathing suit?” It was Kaname whose face began to look crestfallen.

“That's true. And a towel. A wet shirt. A costume in a play. My pajamas. It’s so annoying, so intrusive…it’s…it’s…” Naru looked at war with herself.

“NICE…wonderful…fortunate. Unfair.” That last word came out with an explosion of breath. Kaname felt a heavy weight on her shoulders. There was a tightness around her heart.

Naru stared at Kaname for a moment, surprised. Her expression changed to one of understanding, then sympathy. "Oh. I see. I guess I have been a bit ungrateful, haven’t I. I never stop to think about how things are in action adventure stories.”

Kaname squared her shoulders. “I’m sorry. I’m a guest here. I shouldn’t bring my problems across your doorstep. It’s a tough road, but I have hope still. The fan fiction writers are a big blessing. I get a few nice moments in the first season of the actual show, and some sweet moments in the following season.” Kaname blushed. “Some of the fan writers go a bit heavy on the lemony stuff…but it makes for such WONDERFUL dreams.”

“I know what you mean” Naru said, her cheeks beet red.

Crawling through a ventilation duct, Su fell into the room. “Lemony? That sounds YUMMY!!! I like lemony.” Quick as she came, she was gone.

Naru and Kaname looked at each other. Su must have been misinterpreting things again. Must have. Naru remembered Su’s adult form. She shook her head. That was not something she needed to think about. Fan writers have nothing better to do than to mess around with a good thing….

Kaname sighed.

“It will be OK, Kaname. I’m certain.” Naru tried to do her best to be comforting.

“There was a Mr. Chupi show just like this” Mutsumi said. “I was awake the whole time. I heard everything you said. Don’t worry, I’ll probably forget it by tomorrow.” She stood to walk over to the other two girls, but kicked away the board covering the hole in the floor. She plummeted down into Keitaro’s futon. Undaunted, she resumed the story from down there.

Kaname looked inquisively at Naru. Naru mouthed the words humor her.

“One day, Ms. Chupi…Mr. Chupi’s sister…saw a boy at her school who looked and acted different than everyone else. At first, he just followed her around, making her wonder if he were a stalker. But, he was just shy. He didn’t know how to say what was in his heart. He just wanted to be near her. He made certain she was protected. She thought he was just a frog, but he was a prince. They fell in love and….”

“LEMONS…lots of lemons. Lemonade. Lemon chiffon. Lemon cream pie. Lemon drops…” Su ducked back into a hole in Naru’s bookshelf just before the Mr. Chupi doll hit, knocking a few more books down.

Mutsumi continued, unfazed. “They fell in love, and soon thereafter, they were stuck on large wooden skewers by weird looking aliens…roasted over a fire…and eaten.”

“That’s NOT how it happened!” Naru roared.

“That’s right” Kaname said. “It was more like this. Ms. Chupi had a fine life. She was admired and respected. Finally things were looking up in her life. She was a bit of an idol, but that was OK. One day, this boy with a scar on his face shows up. He carried a gun in his book bag. He destroyed the bust she had made for art class, thinking it was a man attacking her. He tackled teachers. He blew up lockers and art class. He ran around in a Bonta-Kun suit going fumo fumo. He shot watermelons with a shotgun.” Mutsumi passed out again. “He forgot study sessions. He had a captain in his room.” Kaname’s voice was getting faster and faster, higher pitched and higher pitched. “He wouldn’t get scared at ghost stories. He threw grenades in class. He put peoples’ head in toilets. He kissed another girl while pretending to be her boyfriend. He….”

“Kaname, I may not be too bright sometimes, but even I can’t believe anyone would write a show like that. I mean, even little kids wouldn’t believe something so crazy….” Mutsumi was conscious again.

The look in Naru’s eyes left no doubt: she believed every word that Kaname said. She walked over and hugged the blue-haired girl. “Thank you for telling me that. I don’t feel so bad now.”

************************************************************
It was definitely and eerie and exciting situation, Kurz thought, running through the seemingly endless maze of dark tunnels, the way lit by darting and tenuous beams of light from two helmet lamps. Seta ran ahead, Sara in his arms. She had grown tired quickly, but had enough energy to stick her tongue out at Kurz repeatedly, throwing whatever pieces of crumbling rock she could pry off of the passing walls.

“Daddy, I really like Mr. Kurz” she said, scoring a direct hit on Kurz left shoulder with a fist-sized piece of muddy stone. “He’s such a good man.” A slimey piece of rotten tree root made Kurz run to the side, banging his knee on the tunnel wall.

“That’s wonderful, Sara. I haven’t seen you take a fancy to anyone this quickly before…except for Keitaro.” Seta ran like a seasoned marathoner.

Sarah mouthed the word “loser” to Kurz, who was wondering if Melissa had been like this as a child.

There were some benefits to the situation, Kurz realized. He was bring up the rear, and that was an apropos term. Growing somewhat weary, Kitsune ran ahead of him, wobbling and bouncing in enticing and interesting ways. Paying much too much attention to the young woman’s anatomy, he zigged when he should have zagged, running into a low-hanging stalagtite.

Sarah was ecstatic.

Picking himself off the ground, Kurz took a moment to listen. The sound of the pursuit was still there, growing somewhat louder. There was also a noise coming from ahead. An industry noise. Banging. Metal on metal. The sound of distant pneumatic power tools. There was a faint hint of light ahead.

Seta had run into a small alcove and crouched behind a pile of small boulders. The rest of the runners soon joined him. The cloudlike mass of flying metallic turtles soon began passing by, headed in the direction of the noises. Like cars patiently waiting for a long freight train to pass, Seta, Kurz, Kitsune, and Sarah waited for the mechatamas to pass them by. One hovered by the alcove entrance for a few agonizing minutes, before heading off after its brethren. Soon, the noises down the tunnel became erratic. Sounds of gunfire could be heard. Small pieces of rubble fell on their heads after a series of distant concussions.

“Come on Daddy, let’s hurry up. It sounds like all of the fun is up that way!” Sara was trying to break free of her adoptive father’s grasp.

“You’re going to have to be patient, Sara. Daddy and Kurz are going to reconnoiter, while you and Miss Konno wait here.” Seta walked out into the tunnel, motioning for Kurz to follow him.

“I’ll be ever so glad to watch Sara for you Seta. Now, and whenever you may want me too.” Kitsune was blushing slightly.

Before he left, Kurz turned to Kitsune and shook his finger. “You see. All this trouble will teach you. Cheaters never prosper!” He then did a quick Texas two-step as Sara sent boulders flying at his feet.

Kitsune blew Kurz a kiss. “Sure they do, sugar. Sometimes they just have to be patient….” Kurz decided that he’d check his wallet again as soon as he had time.

When Kurz caught up with Seta, the archaeologist was wearing a formless black body suit. Where had that come from?

“I take it you’re more than a pretty boy?” Seta said, doing a couple of deep knee bends…moving his neck in circles…and throwing some rapid shadow kicks and punches. “Do they teach you stealth techniques in Mithril?” Seta’s face was serious, but he allowed himself a small tight smile.

“Yes…some…HOW?…”

“No time for that now. I’ll take point. It’s been a while since I’ve needed to make use of certain skills. Haruka and I have a past we don’t speak of here.” Before Kurz could answer, Seta was gone.

Kurz ran in the direction of the conflict ahead.


************************************************************

The jungle noises, so noisy and rude but moments ago, remained absent. The jangling sound of metal links could be heard, as a chain went loose…snapped tight…went loose again, and then strained at the limit of its strength. A small bird cried out, going silent again when it was answered by a grunting roar. Small marmosets peaked cautious from behind a mossy branch, spilling the water from a full bromeliad. Seeing a flash of white, they scampered deeper into the foliage.

Shirai and Haitani sweated, their eyes darting towards the large and muscular form of the persistent alligator. Dressed in large turtle shells---for reasons lost to them---they were roped to large wooden stakes driven into the loamy soil of Su’s room. Shiro, left in Su’s care while her sister Amala took a brief trip abroad, slowly bent the metal pole his collar was chained to. The more the pole bent, the furter the ring slid up the pole. It looked to be a race: what would happen first…would the links in the chain finally break, or would the ring slide off the top of the pole?

There was a price for their defiance.

“We should have told them back then!” Haitani said, his voice high-pitched with fear.

“Can I help it if I enjoy being whipped by Haruka. I had hoped she’d come back here and do it some more….Haaarruuuukaa….” Shirai was not nearly as frantic as his taller companion.

“You’re sick, do you know that? Sick! We’re about to be alligator yum yums and you sit there fantasizing.”

“What are you so worried for. We’re the comic relief. Comic relief doesn’t usually get eaten in romantic comedies.” Shirai tried to convince himself as much as Haitani.

“Sure…sure…but some people would find it funny if we snuffed it!” Those people know who they are.

Shirai looked worried.

A small chorus of birds called out.

A spider monkey gave a few barking grunts and a strident howl.

A chain link snapped.

************************************************************

In her room, Motoko looked at her sister's komono. It looked so different than the full suit of samurai armor standing behind her, bold in its angles and stance. She thought back to the warrior that her sister had once been. The lightning could not have been so swift. The thunderclap could not be so powerful. Monsters, apparitions, and goblins fell to her blade like wheat to a scythe.

Oni, tengu, tanuki...they had been no match for her! Hannya, kappa...they had no chance against her. But then, she fell in love. She became more feminine. She left the way of the warrior.

Motoko was not the warrior that her sister had become. She had idolized her sister. Would she go down the same path? How could a man make her lose her control. How could a cockroach seem more fierce than the evil spirit of a sunken ship or a giant mechanical turtle? Hadn't she been through this already with Keitaro?


*************************************************

Sousuke walked back into the Hinata Apartments alone as Keitaro went off to see if there was any sign of Seta, Kitsune, and Sara. Melissa was the only one sitting in the living room area. A huge pile of beer bottles covered the floor in front of her. A number of rice bowls had been converted into ash trays, close to overflowing with cigarette butts. The Sgt. Major leaned irreverently on the couch, one leg hooked over the back. A couple of containers of canned crab were nearly empty.

“Sousuke, good to see you survived!” Melissa slurred her speech a bit.

“Sgt. Major? I was in no combat?”

“I wasn’t talking about that. I was referring to the Love Hina stuff. That and the Fumoffu-like plotting. You’re hanging in there pretty well.” Melissa flicked a still smoking but towards the nearest ashtray, not looking to see where it fell.

“Oh, I see. It has been…different…but not altogether unpleasant. Will things be changing over soon?”

Melissa took a long pull of beer, then slammed to bottle down. She got up and looked to the left, down a long hallway. She did the same to the right. No one was around. "Not f@cking soon enough to suit my tastes.!!!” She paused a moment, to see if she would be censored. “We still need to get some plot holes spackled up by those two clownish friends of Keitaro. And, we need to find out what Kentaro has discovered underground. You’ll need to put some weapons where Kurz can get at them without breaking the tempo. Do that behind the scenes. You feeling pretty strong?”

“Yes, I have suffered no lasting injuries.”

“Good. You’ll have to suffer Kaname’s wrath a bit more, and some nonsense with Su and her little toys. Shinobu will need to get set for her part. You’ll need to make Motoko doubt herself some more. Not long after that, it will be time to do things Full Metal Panic style. You will need to help Miss Aoyama regain her confidence at some point, though. It will be crucial at the end.” ” Melissa smiled. It had been too long since she kicked Kurz’ ass. She was looking forward to that. “Oh, if you want, you can help the Hinata folks ease their way into things. Feel free to use knives, guns, and grenades any time you feel so inclined.”

Sousuke stood at attention. He snapped off a crisp salute. That might have been a ghost of a smile that danced on his lips. “As you COMMAND, Sgt. Major!”

*************************************************************


Sousuke, when he had time, would think about the perversity inherent in Creation. There should have been more trouble when he had made an effort to teach an innocent and timid young girl to use firearms. There should be no reason to expect any trouble when he was simply standing in the kitchen watching that same girl cook. True, he had not needed to bring his weapons bag with him for his cooking lesson, but it never hurt to be prepared, did it?

Sninobu, dressed in a flowered apron, had given Sousuke a brief overview of the kitchen…training in the use of various utensils…and tips about the proper selection of choice ingredients. While she had done that, sparing a few moments to stutter and to blush when she caught her student looking at her, Sousuke had filled in the gaps in the conversation with continued questions about her fellow tenants. Next came the preparation stage. For Shinobu, that meant cooking dinner, teaching the young soldier as she went from step to step and dish to dish. For Sousuke, it meant taking moments to discuss basic tactics, and showing the schoolgirl various weapons and ammunitions.

Just your usual meal preparation.

The countertop was full. There were pots, bowls, strainers, ladles, and oven mitts. There were bags of noodles, bottles of sesame sauce, paper-wrapped fish, and small baskets of mushrooms and tofu. There were clips of 9mm…smoke and concussion grenades…a tonfa and a jutte…a Glock 17 and an FN P-90. Sousuke had left the fragmentation grenades and claymores in his bag. The kitchen should be a place of comfort and safety!!! he had reminded himself.

They had been ready to begin.

“We will start with Miso soup. We’ll need the miso paste, Wakaname seaweed, and tofu. First….” Shinobu sounded very business-like. She was happy, confident in her surroundings.

“SOUSUKE! S-o-u-s-u-k-e. Sousuke, are you in here?” It was Kaname, and she looked somewhat upset. “Here you are. You can play house later. I need your help with something more important.” She didn’t notice the narrowing of Shinob’s eyes or the twitching of her hand.

“Kaname? Are we under attack? Have you discovered an important lead?” Sousuke moved quickly to the kitchen window, looking outside without showing much of his silhouette. He listened intently for the sound of a ruckus or struggle.

“No, Sousuke, nothing like THAT. I said important. It’s about manners, Sgt. Social. Manners and common courtesy!” Kaname looked annoyed having to explain the situation to her protector.

“I assure you, Kaname, I am being VERY courteous. Miss Maehara can vouch for that fact.” Sousuke stood at attention. Shinobu nodded her head vigorously.

“Not you, Sousuke. Melissa. There are beer bottles and cigarettes butts everywhere. You have to get her under control!” Kaname glared at Sousuke, hands on her hips. The halisen was in the crook of her arm.

Sousuke thought a moment before responding. While outside, he had talked to Keitaro off screen, learning something about the capricious nature of women. He had been told that an outward complaint often reflected a more important internal displeasure or disappointment. His fellow bruise-of-the-day club member had also offered insight into possible causes of Kaname’s earlier anger. Sousuke had been fortunate. It is not every day that he ran into someone so wise in the ways of the gentler sex.

“Melissa is my superior, Kaname.” That took care of that issue once and for all. Kaname should be grateful that he handled that matter first. It showed kindness and consideration. “I believe I understand why you are angry at me. Let me say that I am indeed aware that you have breasts. Two of them. Each roughly the same size. I consider them to be appropriately shaped for a girl your age.” Kaname’s eyes opened wide, then narrowed to slits. He forehead furrowed deeply. Before she could speak, Sousuke reached out and fondled her. “They have a rather pleasant consistency, as well.”

Sninobu dropped a spoon with a loud clatter.

There was a small sonic boom. The vacuum caused by the passing halisen caused a number of different spices to dance on the air. Sousuke remained spread-eagled against the far wall for a moment, before slowly sliding to the ground.

Kaname managed a self satisfied “PERVERT!” and “Hmmppff” before sputtering. “You better not gurgle gurgle gurgle…” Shinobu had turned the sink spray on Kaname, unleashing an unbelievably powerful stream of water, sending the unsuspecting young woman stumbling into the next room.

A large crash of bottles, furniture, and a bowls could be heard. “Kaname, what are you doing. Could you please clean up that mess you made.” Haruka’s voice.

After Shinobu finished with the soup, Sousuke showed her the finer points of the small submachine gun he had selected. Then, it was Shinobu’s turn again.

“Everybody here likes my Yakizakama and Yakitori, so we’ll do those next. After we put the chicken on the skewer, I’ll show you how to prepare the fish for grilling. We should….”

“Curse you, Sagara!" Motoko stood in the doorway.

"You have caused me to doubt myself as a warrior again. I will regain my purity and focus. I will purge my weakness. Secret technique, rock splitting sword.” The halisen had been the turtle to the sword’s hare. The blade flashed towards Sousuke, every ounce of Motoko’s strength behind it. No one should have been able to see it, much less stop it.

In one fluid movement, Sousuke snatched up the jutte and caught Motoko’s word. With a strong twist of his wrist, he tore it from her grasp, sending it skittering back into the hallway. He placed its blunt end against Motoko and pushed her back out of the kitchen.

“Did you see the motions, Miss Maehara? Should I repeat that for you again?” He spoke very calmly, his back turned to an enraged martial artist. He reached down, picked up a concussion grenade, and pulled the pin. He nonchalantly rolled it at Motoko’s feet when she was bending over to pick up her sword. He decided he should throw in a compliment as well…it might make Miss Aoyama feel more appreciated.

“You are a very good warrior, Miss Aoyama. I have also noticed that you have a well-rounded posterior, the type favored by many men. It may indeed be of greater aesthetic value than Miss Chidori’s.”

“DAMN YOU!” Motoko’s rage increased tenfold. “Secret technique air…” The exploding grenade drowned out whatever she was planning to say. The hole in the Fusuma was roughly Motoko shaped.

“Grenades are very useful. I am still mystified why their use is not taught in school!” Sousuke grinned ever so slightly, comfortable in his environment. “Did you notice the time until detonation?”

“Y-Y-Yes…” Shiobu’s eyes were big and round.

“Very good. You are a quick study. It is a pleasure to have such an able student.” Shinobu blushed, bringing her hand up to her face.

After she had finished with the grilled fish, and Sousuke had placed the last of the chicken on to cook, Shinobu started in on the curry rice. “This is one of Su’s favorites. She could eat it every night. It’s way too spicy for anyone else. And…”

“Did someone call my name?” Su appeared in the doorway, a small controller in her hand. “What are you two doing in here alone? Is it something n-a-u-g-h-t-y? You are such a bad boy, Sousuke!” She ran full speed, jumping, aim her heels at Sousuke’s forehead.

Sousuke stepped to the side with an amazing economy of motion. Grabbing Su by the feet, he used her momentum against her, sending her into a series of pots and pans hanging from the ceiling.

“That was fun! I like playing with you.” Su was back on her feet. “ I didn’t forget my promise. I brought something fun for you and Shinobu …” After taking a moment to bite the head off of a grilled mackerel, she pushed a toggle switch on her controller. She scarfed down some champon.. “Mmmm…mmmpff…that was very tasty. It’s time for the new and improved Mr. Cherry #1.”

There was a whirling noise. Heavy metallic steps. A strange round robot waddled into the room, a pair of spinning cherries present where the mouth on the painted face was. “Here it comes, Shinobu.” Su was hopping up and down in excitement.

Sninobu was trembling, looking for a place to run. “Oh no. Not that. Not THAT….”

Sousuke picked up the P-90, slammed a clip home, and tossed it to the frightened young girl, safety disengaged. “Do as you wish” he said when she caught it.

For a moment, as she watched the hypnotic spinning cherries, Shinobu froze. She snapped out of her trance when she heard Sousuke quietly say “You can do this.” A scowl replacing her look of fright, Shinobu turned the odd little robot into a collander.

“Well done.” Sousuke said approvingly. When he turned to admonish Su, he saw that she was gone.

Just then, Mutsumi walked into the kitchen area as if nothing had happened. “Shinobu, will there be watermelon for dinner?”

She noticed Sousuke. “Oh my. So many guns. I hope they are not for the watermelons. Kaname told me how much you hate watermelons….”

Sousuke had a puzzled look on his face. “Why would you say that? What did Miss Chidori tell you?”

“She told me how you shoot watermelons! Why would anyone be so cruel? Were you frightened by a melon as a child?” Mutsumi shook her head sadly.

“I see. The beach. That was not my game. The others were smashing the melons with a bat. They insisted that I play too. A shotgun was much more appropriate…less violent. In actuality, Watermelons are my favorite non-military issue fruit!”

“Really? How wonderful!” Mutsumi smiled, clapping her hands together. “Oh. I’m Mutsumi Otohime. I’m studying with Keitaro and Naru.” She walked up closer to Sousuke. “You’re very cute, you know.”

Sninobu looked aggravated. Her hand reached towards the water sprayer. Without warning, Mutsuni passed out and fell ever so slowly to the floor. Shiobu rushed to keep her spirit from leaving her body.

When Mutsumi came to, she smiled up at Sousuke. “Have we met?”

“Yes. I am Sousuke Sagara. You are Mutsumi Otohine.”

“Oh. I am? Were we talking about something?” She truly couldn’t remember.

“We were discussing watermelons.” Sousuke had never seen someone stand up so fast.

“Really? I LOVE watermelons!” Mutsumi held her hands tightly to her chest. “Did you know that watermelons were harvested 5000 years ago in ancient Egypt and are still popular in 96 countries today?”

“Yes” Sousuke said. “David Livingstone mentioned vast areas of Africa covered with watermelons. Some explorers used watermelons as canteens.”

Mutsumi’s eyes began to look dreamy. She took a step towards Sousuke. “More than 1200 varieties are grown worldwide. Over 4 billion pounds were grown in the United States alone. The largest melon weighed 262 pounds.” Mutsumi could talk melon forever.

“So I have heard,” Sousuke answered amiably. “A watermelon was thrown at Roman governor Demosthenes during a political debate. He placed it upon his head, thanking the thrower for providing him with a helmet as he fought Philip of Macedonia.” Sousuke could talk military history forever.

Mutsumi sighed happily. Thrusting her chest out, she took another two steps towards an oblivious Sousuke. “Japanese scientists were the first to develop seedless watermelons and square watermelons. Seedless melons come from treating a normal plant with chemicals. Square melons are trained in glass boxes. They fit s-o-o-o nice into cardboard boxes, trucks, and refrigerators.” Her breathing grew fast and heavy. Shinobu noticed and started fidgeting.

“China is the top grower of watermelons” Sousuke replied, not noticing that Shinobu was tugging fiercely on his sleeve. “Followed by Turkey, Iran, the USA….” A startled Sousuke would not get the opportunity to complete his sentence by mentioning Egypt, Korea, and Mexico. Japan is eleventh on the list.

Mutsumi had wrapped her arms around Sousuke and attached her mouth to his, initiating a long deep kiss. Shinobu's eyes were spinning spirals. She looked ready to overheat again.

“S-S-Sousuke!” Kaname was standing in the doorway.

“MUTSUMI!” Naru stood next to her.

“Heh heh heh oooooph. Keitaro had been standing between them both until a Naru Punch sent him through the kitchen window, a string of onions wrapped around one leg.

“Oh my!” Mutsumi said, seeing the look on the face of an approaching Kaname.

A small round object rolled on the floor, stopping at Kaname’s feet. Just before she became airborne, she noticed the pin in Shinobu’s hand.

“I really hate interruptions when I’m trying to cook supper!” Shinobu said, a rather intense look on her face.

**********************************************************
End of part four

[HELLFIRE]

FILLER!!!

...well, least we got FMP! ppl opening up to their counterparts in LH.
I'm still waiting for when Sousuke returns the favor and lays booby traps
and mines in the entrance to the hot springs, throws smoke grenades
every time Su makes a move towards him, uses the Military-Otaku
-style of martial arts on Seta, etc...







Regards

[dd]

DAMN Tough crowd.

But, things aren't set in stone [EDIT]. Part four has been streamlined and will be added to.

[HELLFIRE]

...having Bonta-kun raise some hell around the Inn would be interesting.
Perhaps a Tessa(look-alike) wandering around, and making Keitaro's
eye wander too far off track, to which Naru corrects his... flawed ways...

// as a sidenote
Maybe consider coloring the new sections you edited, dd. That way ppl
aren't having to reread the whole thing over and over just to make sure
they're not missing anything. Just my 0.02





Regards

[dd]

@HELLFIRE

Hopefully the new stuff meets with your approval

I might see if I can have the real Tessa make an appearence. It has possibilities. Something to think on.

[HELLFIRE]

Sousuke being so bold... oh MY!!

...I think that's one cooking class that will never reconvene






Regards