New Heaviest Element Discovery!

Post by **Taurec** » Tue Mar 10, 2009 7:42 pm

Governmentium (Gv)

Lawrence Livermore Laboratories has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element, Governmentium (Gv), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons, it is inert; however, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from four days to four years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years; it does not decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

May God help us survive this growing mass before it becomes a black hole that sucks us all in.

Chief Petty Officer Klerk · Tue Mar 10, 2009 10:07 pm

LMAO!

Raspberry · Post by **Raspberry** » Wed Mar 11, 2009 3:24 pm

Wah

Shame I didn't know Governmentium week ago, when I had chemistry class - I'd surely score a moronic note! XD

terran empire · Post by **terran empire** » Wed Mar 11, 2009 6:09 pm

when combined with obamudinium it then forms a unique form of Black hole that sucks up only Money and more money then ever created before!

LeoXiao · Post by **LeoXiao** » Thu Mar 12, 2009 5:16 am

how much Specialized High Intensity Training was needed to discover it?

KiLlEr · Post by **KiLlEr** » Thu Mar 12, 2009 1:45 pm

oh, and here I though Fatassium was the largest element. Its an element that gets created when you expose inert particles to Mcdonaldite.