[FIC] Christmas Cake (pt. 11)

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dd
Cannon
Cannon
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[FIC] Christmas Cake (pt. 11)

Post by dd »

Sousuke shouted again. No, he screamed. There was so much deep within him that wanted to get out.

The first yell had been a challenge to the elements, daring them to hold him back. Rain was washing over Arbalest… the launch deck of the TDD-1 was awash in violent churning waves… winds were whipping around the Arm Slave and submarine like a ravenous pack of hyenas… none of that could stop him.

Thrown airborne by the tremendous toss of the steam catapult, and with his rocket boosters pulling him ever higher, he shouted again in pure animal ecstasy. He didn’t have his own wings, but it was clear he was meant to soar. Upward through the angry clouds he went, until he burst free into the untainted light above.

“Cruising altitude reached. Maintaining at this level.” The A.I. was functioning perfectly. Sousuke wanted nothing to do with ‘perfectly functioning.’

There was life to live.

There were things to experience.

He switched over to manual. He held the throttle down, racing higher and higher. He was a falcon… a hawk… an eagle. Memories of Greek mythology cautioned him, trying to temper his rash behavior. The story of Icarus WAS a good lesson, part of him asserted.

The other part didn’t care. That other part was fast becoming the majority.

“Urzu-7, this is Flight Monitor. You are far off course. Repeat, you are far off course. Conserve the necessary fuel for potential maneuvers needed at landing. Urzu-7, do you----” Sousuke turned off the minor level communications link with Da Danaan. It was interfering with his music.

Yes.

This was something he had never truly appreciated.

Why hadn’t he gotten into music before? Because it wasn’t in the manual. It didn’t seem civilized. He had been too innocent. He couldn’t identify with any of the themes. Desire was bad. Impulses had to be held down. So many rules. So many restraints. Everything had to be rational, realistic, and reasonable.

Not any more!!!

‘Living easy, living free

‘Season ticket on a one-way ride

‘Asking nothing, leave me be

‘Taking everything in my stride

‘Don’t need reason, don’t need rhyme

‘Ain’t nothing I would rather do

‘Going down, party time

‘My friends are gonna be there too

‘I’m on the highway to hell… highway to hell…. I’m on the highway to hell

‘No stop signs, speed limit

‘Nobody’s gonna slow me down….’

Sousuke shouted again. It was a challenge to the Universe, to Infinity if you will. He had a mission to carry out. It didn’t matter if it was a one-way ride. He would get the job done because he wanted to, not because someone told him to do it. He remembered something Gauron once said to him.

He paraphrased.

It was the intentions that mattered.

“Ferryman… you’re going to be busy. There are some Arm Slave pilots looking to come visit. I’ll see who else I can find to keep them company!”

The enemy was just one more thing that stood in his way. That would be their last mistake.

His fingers tapping along, Sousuke understood why Kurz liked to listen to music before a mission. He could even appreciate why it pumped him up during battle.

There wasn’t too much time before he would arrive on site.

Better enjoy the rush while he could. The next song jacked him up even higher.

‘Well I don't know where they come from

‘But they sure do come

‘I hope they're comin' for me

‘And I don't know how they do it

‘But they sure do it good

‘I hope they're doin' it for free

‘They give me cat scratch fever… cat scratch fever… I’ve got it bad scratch fever… cat scratch fever

‘Well the first time that I got it

‘I was just 10 years old

‘I got it from some kitty next door

‘Well I went and seen the doctor

‘And he gave me the cure

‘I think I got it some more…’

Sousuke howled, riding a wave of hormones, not caring if he wiped out before reaching the shore. Why had he hidden from all this? What could he possible gain from holding back? It felt so good just being able to let go.

His thoughts grew more exciting as his urges grew earthier.

There were part’s of that medicated mind that fought back, frightened and repulsed by the urges he was feeling. He was confused. He was embarrassed. Repressed. Suppressed. Inexperienced.

He was a teen-aged boy, with all that it entailed.

‘Well I make a pussy purr

‘With the stroke of my hand

‘They know they're gettin' it from me

‘And they know just where to go

‘When they need their lovin' man

‘They know I'm doin' it for free….’

So, he might not have the experience to back up the words. It didn’t matter. Held back too long, he had never allowed himself to even explore his desires. He rarely even acknowledged they were there!

He fought like a man. He did a man’s job. Why hadn’t he collected a man’s reward?

Things were going to change. O yes, things were going to change.

He howled again.

Freedom was wonderful. Lust had him tingling all over. What else could he exalt?

‘I never give no answers, I never tell no lies

‘I never walk a straight line so I never get surprised

‘I don't ask no favours so I won't get abused

‘I learned to win when I was young

‘So I'm never ever gonna lose…’

Sousuke chuckled deep within his throat, identifying with the song. He didn’t know the title. He didn’t know the band. He didn’t care. It was his song now.

“That’s right. I’m not going to lose. Not any more. No more doing what I’m told to do. No more helping everybody else win. No more living off of favors. It’s time to start taking what’s mine.”

A green light began flashing on the data panel. Sousuke paused the music and pushed a button.

“Weather report encoding, Sergeant. Wind speed and directional information transferring to the screen. Approach and landing orders have been received. Displaying them now on a split screen.”

The A.I.’s voice was cold and dispassionate. Sousuke felt sorry for it. It sounded just like he once did. Too bad it couldn’t feel like he did now. He’d have to enjoy life for the both of them.

Sousuke looked at the required approach vectors. He took note of wind gust trending in the various available quadrants. Looking at the mission parameters he shook his head.

“Al, disregard all current parameters regarding landing protocol. We will approach under power. I am not about to use a chute on descent. Prior to landing, activate the Lambda Driver. Create a shield as we discussed earlier. But, make it circumferential with complete coverage. Extend the filed to maximum extent, with increasing gradation from outer perimeter inward. We will use the field to soften our landing.”

He smiled, feeling his heart beat strong and hearing the rush of blood in his ears. He never could understand why Kurz and Melissa enjoyed watching the X-games on TV, until now. This ought to be the greatest X-game ever.

“We’re going to take some folks by surprise. If we land intact, that is!” Part of his mind started figuring out the percentage chances. He purposefully stopped that kind of thinking. Numbers were for accountants and people too afraid to take life as it came.

But, those thoughts were no so easily denied. The model of persistence, they beat down the wall he had formed. This was too reckless. It was not a game. He should follow the orders. A mistake could prove fatal… for him… for his squad mates… for the land of his birth.

And for someone else.

‘Kaname,’ his mind shouted.

Kaname.

She could be hurt.

She could be killed.

“No. N-N-No….” Sousuke struggled with himself. He did not want to get caught up in internal debates. Pushing a button, he turned his attention back to the music.

‘I never ask no questions, I never speak my mind

‘I always found that silence helps to keep me and my kind alive

‘I take care of business, It takes care of me

‘I look after myself and do it well

‘cause somebody's always looking for me….’

Yes. It was time to take care of business. But, this time he would enjoy it. The challenge. The competition. The fighting. The destruction. The winning. Every last bit of it.

‘I got no place, no name, I'm just a killing machine

‘I kept the population down, if you know what I mean

‘I never stop in one place, I move about the cities

‘Got expensive tastes, but I hasten to add that

‘I'm the best that there is….’

He couldn’t put it any better. He WAS a killing machine. He would make certain that the North Koreans and fools from Grendel realized HE was the best that there is.

Pulling up the mission outline, he ran his eyes down a list of mission objectives grouped by priority, order of performance, and assigned responsibility.

He would need to rework it.

Why should he limit himself? He knew why they tried to limit him. They wanted to control him. They didn’t want others to see his superiority. They didn’t want to share the power.

Too bad.

Too damn bad.


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Stacy sat on the floor, carefully unwrapping the items she had brought in her larger shopping bag. Kaname looked on, filled with curiosity, glad that her father had relented and allowed the Mithril agent to stay. His dictate had been firm, however. She stays out of the way. His trust was still in Mr. Smith.

“Is that an Uzi?” Kaname saw similarities in the shape of the Submachine gun that Stacy placed on the floor and the Uzi that Sousuke occasional used..

“No. Ruger M9. But, it’s essentially an upgrade of the Uzi design. Main improvements over the Uzi include the blow-back operated action being re-designed to be fired from the closed bolt, to increase accuracy; the lower receiver with the handle is made from Zytel polymer, while the upper receiver is made from stainless steel; the butt-stock is redesigned, and is telescopic. When closed, it folds down.” She demonstrated as she spoke.

“Nine millimeter?”

“Yes. Thirty-two rounds. Not the best gun available, but I’m used to it. I trained with one. My parents thought I was going away to cheerleading camp.” Stacy checked the spare clips she had lined up next to the gun.

“I suppose most parents might have some issue with their daughter becoming an undercover soldier.” Kaname laughed. “No offense. I believe that people should do what they need to do.” She went on to tell Stacy about some of her trials and tribulations in Japan.

“And on top of all that, you won the big prize. You got to be Whispered. You seem to be handling it very well.” Stacy wasn’t ready to talk too much about her sister yet. The word ‘Whispered’ still had trouble rolling over her lips every time she said it.

“I guess part of that must be because of the agent guarding you.” Kim had been very impressed by the Mithril personnel who had taught her self defense. That was one of the reasons she had taken things further.

Stacy put a large black pistol on the floor. Kaname recognized that one. Sousuke used one on certain occasions.

“Desert Eagle.” She saw Stacy nod her head, one eyebrow raised. She licked her lips before continuing.

“Maybe Sousuke is a help,” Kaname admitted. “Probably because he keeps me distracted, the big otaku idiot!” She laughed.

“Ahhhh. Romanatic stuff?” Kim looked up at Kaname’s face, holding her clips of .50 Magnum ammunition against her chest. She didn’t look like an operative. Her face was that of a teenage girl who loved gossiping and telling secrets.

“No.” Not yet. Not a lot, any way. Something special happened though. She paused again.

“Uh... how do I put this... he’s a terror.” Kaname went on to give Stacy a capsular summary of Sousuke.

“You’re exaggerating, I hope!” Kim’s face exhibited a mixed look of amusement and disbelief. She stopped in the middle of breaking down her second M9.

“No. I left out some of the more ridiculous stuff. I didn’t want to give you a bad impression of him.” Kaname shook her head.

“My God! I can’t believe you never asked to have a new agent. How does he even stay in the organization? The Finance people alone must want his head. Legal too! And all the Sweepers who have to keep things quiet.” She critically examined a detachable gun barrel, making certain it didn’t show signs of wear.

“Probably because he’s one of the best soldiers they have.” Kaname spoke with a touch of pride in her voice. Once upon a time, she would have been choosing between denial and denigration instead of pride and appreciation.

“He never ceases to amaze me. He causes a lot of small headaches, but he has brought me through a number of big nightmares.” Kaname didn’t like dwelling too much on the bad times. But as long as Sousuke was in a memory, she felt safe walking through it again.

Stacy looked on, obviously curious. She tried not too appear too over-eager.

“I suppose it’s alright to tell you these stories. You’re part of the team, so to speak.” Kaname went on to tell her newest bodyguard about Khanka, and about her run in with A21. She mentioned a number of smaller scale encounters as well.

Her petite blonde-companion ran a hand through her hair, a serious look on her face. There was something she wanted to ask, but thought twice about it. Kaname picked up on it.

“What?” Kaname asked.

“Sousuke’s one of the best Arm Slave pilots we have?” Stacy still found that difficult to fathom. A seventeen year old boy piloting those big metal beasts. Then again, she was sitting on the floor working on a submachine gun on Christmas afternoon.

“Yes,” Kaname said. Then her face stiffened, She suddenly knew what Stacy must want to ask. She hung her head.

“Yes. He left on a mission not long before I did. I can only assume it had to do with North Korea.”

Stacy put her hand on Kaname’s and squeezed. “I’ll add my prayers to yours. You have to hold on to hope. I guess he’s come to mean a lot to you, hasn’t he?” She thought of her own boyfriend. What would she feel if he was in the middle of a deadly fracas?

Kaname nodded her head, trying to smile. “He kept me so frustrated so much of the time, that I never let myself see just how much interest I had in him. I still call HIM clueless, but it took me a while to admit my feelings to myself.” Kaname sighed.

“Then, when I finally realized the truth.... he’s back in danger.... again. The big stupid head!!!”

Stacy checked the charge on her taser. Putting it away, she looked up again at Kaname.

“But when he gets back, you’ll get to pick up where you left off, right?” The young operative was taken aback by the look on Kaname’s face. “He doesn’t return your feelings?”

“I don’t know.” Kaname bit her lip and clenched her hands. “I... I think he was finally showing feelings for me. But, I don’t even know if there will be a Tokyo for him to head back to. Even if there is, I may not be allowed to go back.” She went on to bare her soul to her new companion.

“Even if you go back, its sounds like your father wouldn’t approve of your dating anyone. That’s rough.” Stacy in turn told Kaname about her life. They both went on to trade stories, wishes, dreams, and concerns about the future.

“Sounds like you’re really scared,” Stacy observed at one point.

“Wouldn’t you be? I’m Whispered. My usual protector is halfway around the world, facing who knows what. The lives of my friends are on the line.” Kaname tossed her hair. She stopped and frowned. It had almost become passe to talk about such things.

“No. About tonight’s dinner guest. Your father’s friend.” The blond girl’s eyes were piercing. She knew she was right on the mark.

Kaname clenched her teeth, wanting to speak up and deny the charge. She couldn’t. But, she didn’t have to answer. Ayame came barreling into the room, needing her next Kaname-fix. The three girls chatted about sundry things until the doorbell rang.

“She’s here!” Ayame squealed happily, sprinting out of the room.

Stacy quickly placed her guns in the shopping bag, covering them with tissue paper. Before Kaname knew it, she was gone.

Kaname couldn’t bring herself to stand at first. She knew that common courtesy would dictate that she go out and meet the woman right away.

First, she had to get herself to say the name.

Oichi.

“Let’s go, girl. Class representatives and student council vice presidents don’t go hiding from problems.”

Well, it wasn’t really a problem, was it?

Kaname’s head knew the answer. Her heart needed convincing.


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“Urzu-7, this is Urzu-2. Do you read me?”

Sousuke smiled. He would keep that woman in suspense a bit. There would be time to talk, when he was ready. Sgt. Major Mao had been trying to raise him intermittently over the past few minutes.

“I repeat. Urzu-7, come in. Respond. Flight control is reporting problems.”

Sousuke looked around the cockpit. He smiled. “Al, you see any problems?”

“No, Sergeant.”

“Me either.”

He yawned, big and long.

“Urzu-7, systems indicate that a connection is established. Sousuke, if you are in any difficulty, let us know by any means possible.”

“Persistent, isn’t she?”

“Sergeant?”

“Never mind, Al. It is not a problem. Shut down the link.”

“I cannot do that, Sergeant. On this mission, you do not have the prerogative. Only Captain Testarossa, Cmdr. Mardukas, or Lt. Cmdr. Kalinin have the clearance to blank such communications.”

“Shit.”

They show their true colors. They want me to be a follower, not a leader. They feel a need to control me. Mistake

“Urzu-7, do you copy?”

“This grows tedious.” Sousuke switched on his microphone. “Urzu-2, this is Urzu-7. Continue your mission as planned. You have my permission. You might as well stay on the beach and take care of the signal fire. I’m heading into the jungle to do some hunting. If you’re lucky, I’ll let you watch me dance when I make the kill.”

Sousuke laughed. That ought to play with her head some. He doubted that she would catch the reference, but didn’t care. The only thing that mattered was that he knew what he was talking about.

“Sousuke! What is going on? Is there something wrong with your air-handling system? Set your system to medical evaluation mode. It sounds like you need to check for oxygen deprivation.”

Oxygen deprivation?

Hardly!

He had been deprived of just about everything else…but not any more. He reached over to one panel and unlatched the door. Smiling, he took out a number of different skin paints. They weren’t needed for body camouflage now. He smeared the colors on his face, forming a mask. There was a need for emancipation---he would make a cover that he could hide behind symbolically, liberating him and freeing himself as a result.. He would be free to do or say anything he wanted it to.

His innermost self image fought against the idea. The act would help erode his identity. He would slide ever closer to savagery.

He didn’t pay attention.

“It’s my turn. I hid behind a mask before, a numb obedient mask. That mask held me back. This one will set me free. Right Al?”

“Sergeant, I do not know.”

“Of course not, Al. You’re nothing but a machine. Welcome to my nightmare.”

“Urzu-7, do you read me. Sousuke, what do your readouts show.”

“Urzu-2, they show that you are beginning to bore me. I’ve got a battle to fight. As long as you and the others do your part, you will be allowed to assist me. Just make certain that nobody gets in my way.”

Not wanting to listen to any of Sgt. Major Mao’s likely responses, Sousuke turned the music up louder, unable to hear anything else but that.

‘Crazy, but that's how it goes

‘Millions of people, living as foes

‘Maybe it's not too late

‘To learn how to love

‘And forget how to hate

‘Mental wounds not healing…Life's a bitter shame…I'm going off the rails on the crazy train….’

“Maybe I need a little craziness.” Sousuke imagined himself at the controls of an old steam locomotive. Speeding down from the sky, roaring towards a pending battle, that analogy felt apt. Smiling, he mentally pushed the lever full ahead. He switched the tracks over, putting himself on a head on course with another train.

‘I've listened too preachers

‘I've listened too fools

‘I've watched all the dropouts

‘Who make their own rules

‘One person conditioned to rule and control

‘The media sells it and you live the role….’

Yes, he had listened to his share of fools. He was the biggest fool of all, believing them and following their directions. They had helped condition him. They sold him a role and he took it hook, line, and sinker.

Not any more.

‘Mental wounds still screaming

‘Driving me insane

‘I'm going off the rails on a crazy train

‘I know that things are going wrong for me… you gotta listen to my words… yea-h!’

No. It’s time to heal those mental wounds. It’s finally time to become sane.

‘Heirs of a cold war

‘That's what we've become

‘Inheriting troubles, I'm mentally numb

‘Crazy, I just cannot bear

‘I'm living with something that just ain't fair

‘Mental wounds not healing

‘Who and what's to blame

‘I'm going off the rails on a crazy train!’

Indeed. He was always taking care of everyone else’s problems. He did the jobs that no one else could do. He was always saddled with the chores that no one else wanted. Who really ever took the time to look after his troubles? Was it any wonder he had ended up mentally numb?

It was time to look after himself.

“Sergeant, I have collated all of the incoming messages.” The A.I.’s voice was finally audible as the song died down.

“Aircraft are finding it difficult to locate targets and approach due to the cloud cover and strong winds near the ground. All pilots are ordered to remain on site, nonetheless. A number of helicopters are down after hard landings. Casualties are low. Urzu-2, Urzu-5, and Urzu-6 report themselves outside of the L.Z., their parachutes snagged in trees.”

“Pathetic fools. They had to follow the rules, and look where they ended up. How many damn trees could there even be in this region?”

No problem. I can handle this all on my own.

“Al, what reports do we have on ground movement?”

“Sergeant, there is little data in. Spotters report limited mechanized infantry, apparently working as scouts. There is no sign of armor, self-propelled guns, or tracked triple-A. At least not in plain sight.”

“Arm Slaves, Al?”

“None, Sergeant. Not yet.”

“Great. Really good. That means I can find something else to play with. Maybe some missiles. Those should do nice as starters.”

“Sergeant, review of the mission parameters shows that Urzu-7 is assigned to interdiction against opposing Arm Slaves. Exclusive. No exceptions.”

“Al, did I order you to read those parameters?” Sousuke’s voice was little more than a growl.

“No, Sergeant.”

“Did I ask to be limited in my actions and desires?”

“No, Sergeant.”

“Do I sound like a man who wants to be shackled in a cage, prevented from reaching my full potential?”

“I do not know, Sergeant.”

“Al?”

“Yes, Sergeant?”

“Shut the Hell up!”

Proximity alarms went off, as red light bathed the cockpit. The radar screen indicated a number of quick-approaching objects. Air-to-air missiles. Headed in his direction.

Sousuke smiled. Finally, things were getting interesting. He switched flight controls over to manual. He’d be damned if he’d let some bunch of cowards on the ground shoot him down.

“Al, we’re going in fast. Activate the Lambda Driver. Keep the field at minimum, awaiting my instructions. When we get near the ground, jettison the wing and initiate cushioned landing as previously instructed. Begin plotting all enemy locations. Tie your boots on tight. We’re getting ready to run.”

The first wave of missiles missed their mark, leaving great white trails of smoke off to one side of Arbalest. A second wave of missiles had proximity fuses, but the shrapnel rebounded harmlessly off of the glowing nimbus of light surrounding the ARX-7.

The threat monitor kept flashing. More missile were inbound.

Sousuke laughed. He felt good. His enhanced senses could actually feel the caress from internal part of the Lambda Driver field. There was no reason to fear it. There was no reason to be nervous, or to fear failure. He instinctively knew he could use the Lambda Driver like a brush, painting anything he wanted.

He laughed again. Let the other soldiers follow the rules, marching to the orders of men who were no better than they are. Let them fear the monsters they thought they faced, never really seeing the important truth. There is no external enemy. There is only the beast that lurks within each human being.

The beast was hungry. He would feed it today. There was no need to worry about his emotions---they no longer had any control over him. There was no threat from his thoughts---they were all oriented towards a single goal, the destruction of those who dared challenge him. And his senses? Well, the enhancement of his senses was icing on the cake.

The only limitations lay in the machinery, not in him.


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Kaname passed Stacy in the hallway. The other girl gave her an ‘OK’ sign. It was that woman after all.

No. Not ‘that woman.’

Oichi.

Oichi Masako.

Her father’s girlfriend. Maybe his fiance soon enough. You have to deal with this, girl.

As she neared the foyer, Kaname still didn’t have a glimpse of the their guest. Part of her grasped at a hopeful thought...if she couldn’t see her, maybe she didn’t exist. She shook her head. That kind of thing was so childish.

There was no way to get a clear view yet. Her sister was bouncing up and down happily, like an overly-excited small dog. Her father was there, holding a woman’s coat, a smile on his face. He had dressed in a nice suit and tie. There was no sign of Mr. Smith.

Having dealt with Sousuke often enough, Kaname could sense that Stacy wasn’t far behind her.

“Ahhh. Here’s Kaname.” Her father turned to look in her direction. He tapped Ayame on the shoulder and waved her aside. “Her friend Stacy is with us as well.” Her father would keep things secret. Or so she hoped.

Miss Masako was a short but very attractive middle-aged woman with long black hair. She wore a tasteful designer dress and a small amount of exquisite jewelry. Her body was a study in grace as she bent over to pick up a large flat box off of the floor.

“Kaname. I’ve so much wanted to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.” The voice was musical, cheerful, and vibrant. “I’ve brought a number of Christmas cakes. Your father told me how much you liked them.”

Kaname froze.

The woman was holding the box out for her, but she didn’t move to take it. The box was the problem. She remembered the cakes that her friends had brought into school. She thought about the special cake she had ordered for her and Sousuke, planning to bring it to Belles Des Belles with her. It felt as if her whole world was about to implode.

Kaname....” Her father tried to keep his voice pleasant. There was an edge to it. His eyes pleaded with her. That in itself was enough to distract her.

Oichi pulled the box back slowly. “I suppose we shouldn’t worry about such things until after dinner.”

“No. I’m sorry. It’s very rude of me.” Kaname reached out her hands and took the box. “It’s just...I...” She pulled herself together, asking herself what Sousuke might think if he were there watching her.

“I really do love Christmas pastries. It was very thoughtful for you to bring them. Thank you.” She bowed.

Shunya nodded his head.

“Did someone mention cake?” Mr. Smith managed to make an appearance, He was introduced by Kaname’s father. After that, Kaname introduced Stacy.

“So, is it turkey and all the fixings again?” Oichi asked Shunya hopefully.

“Yes. Just the way you like it. It’s good to have another convert.” Her father gave her a quick kiss.

Kaname fought down her emotions. For a moment, she had been very jealous of the other woman’s familiarity with her father. The kiss stuck in her craw, too. She remembered her father and mother kissing on occasion. Those memories seemed good and right.

She also thought back to her kiss with a certain scruffy soldier.

She grew a bit irriated. It was OK for her father and that woman to kiss. But, she couldn’t even bring up the subject of Sousuke.

Merry Christmas. Good will to all.

Bah humbug.

“Here. Let me take that. Breath deep, it might help.” Stacy took the box from Kaname. She winked. “It will give you a chance to go in and talk to her.”

Kaname wished she had the halisen with her. The last thing she needed was any help with this.

Ayame, running in the hallway, came to a sliding stop. She held Kaname’s diary in her hand. Sticking her tongue out at Kaname, she darted into the parlor. Her voice carried throughout the hallway.

“Oichi, look what I gave Kaname for Christmas. A diary. Maybe you can convince her to read from it later on.”

Kaname cursed.


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Arbalest slid sideways, its large metallic feet pushing up huge mounds of dirt and vegetation. Its Bofors cannon shot again and again, punishing the men and light armored vehicles that rolled into range.

“Hah! Beat you to it!” Sousuke gloated, scratching a number of additional kill marks on the console in front of him. He laughed, wondering what the approaching Mithril soldiers must be thinking. He just killed all of their opponents before they had a chance to open fire.

They were too damn slow. They had waited too long, following some stupid order or another, no doubt.

“Al, any sign of Arm Slaves yet?”

“No, Sergeant.”

“Continue towards the missiles, then. I wonder if I should wait until the launch clock reaches five seconds or such, just like in the movies?”

Sousuke piloted Arbalest towards the nearest launching pad, intent on taking out the fueling ICBM.

He was too wound up to think. Thinking was a burden right then. He only wanted to act. If he had bothered to work through things logically, he might have wondered why things seemed so easy. Where was the stiff resistance? Why were the enemy forces doing their best to down approaching aircraft, but paid little attention to the forces on the ground?

“Al, ready all missiles. We’re going to blow that eyesore into a million little pieces. Maybe I’ll make you a necklace from them. Wouldn’t that be nice?” Sousuke smiled, thinking of the destruction to come.

“Sergeant, mission parameters state that the Taepodong missiles should be disabled, not destroyed. The stated goal is to gather proof of nuclear warheads.”

“My parameters state otherwise, Al. The only proof I need is proof of my existence. The only evidence anyone else needs is evidence that I am in control. We’re doing great, Al. There’s no need to mess things up with rules and plans.”

A harsh buzzer annoyed Sousuke, It had been loud enough to be heard through the music. He turned down the volume.

“Urzu-7, this is Da Danaan control. You are ordered to resume your assigned mission. Cease your advance towards the missile launch area. The region has been scanned, and there are no Arm Slaves in the vicinity. The ground troops in position, and will be securing the missiles momentarily. Urzu-7, do you read?”

It was Lt. Kalinin’s voice. He sounded both irritated and concerned. Souske smiled.

Another voice came through the open channel. The speaker obviously didn’t realize he was transmitting.

“I told you this would happen some day. He’s obviously snapped. Can we shut down the Arbalest remotely? We are close to meeting our objective and haven’t seen a single enemy mecha. He may only get in the way. And with the Lambda Driver operating, we can’t destroy him if necessary.”

It was Cmdr. Mardukas, off course.

Sousuke became enraged. They wanted to stop him? They wanted to destroy him if he didn’t follow their narrow-minded little plan? THEY thought that HE was in the way?

“This is Urzu-7. If you wish to converse, you can refer to me as Lord Sagara from now on. I suggest that in the future, you do not let that stiff-necked naval idiot anywhere near the com panel.”

“Sousuke…. Please…. what’s wrong?” It was Captain Testarossa’s voice.

“Hold on, Sousuke. I know it’s not you speaking. It’s those medicines. Can I speak to the old Sousuke. Is he there somewhere?”

Sousuke laughed, not bothering to break the connection. It was all so funny. Tessa didn’t get it. She thought she was so damn smart, but she just didn’t get it.

“I told you, it’s not Sousuke. It’s Lord Sagara. You all wanted me to take those medicines. Now, look what you have. Me. Not the poisons and posions controlling me or influencing my actions. Just me. Freed by the medicines.”

“No, Sousuke. That’s not true. The doctors say that the procedure has worked too well, gone too far. This is not who you really are. The things that make you Sousuke Sagara have been pushed aside or covered up. You have to hold on. Please. You have to.” Tessa’s voice was frightened

“Hold on? What you really mean is that you all want to regain your hold on me! No. never again. I heard that idiot talking. He’s never respected me. He was always waiting for me to fail and prove him right. Always so strict and to the letter.”

Sousuke coughed, his voice going hoarse. He nodded his head. He smiled.

“I know what you want to hold on to, Tessa. Me. Well, after I do what needs to be done here, maybe you’ll get that chance. There are some things I feel like doing. You’ll do.”

‘You’ll do.’

Those words echoed in his head, making him grit his teeth and hiss. The vision of a naked Tessa, laying on his cot, swirled into nothingness like smoke in the wind. He saw Kaname. She had her arms open. She wasn’t offering her body to the returning conqueror.

She was offering her heaert to someone she loved.

No!

He would NOT think about her. He would NOT think about love. Love was about sharing. He did not share. He would take whatever he wanted.

That was his way now.

Memories of the kiss resurfaced. Emotions began jockeying for position, wanting to break free of the iron control.

No! If he wanted to kiss her, nothing would stop him. There would be no need for emotions.

“Kaname.”

No!!!

“Sergeant Sagara, you know me. I have always respected you. I have given you my best, just as you have given me yours.” Lt. Cmdr. Kalinin had resumed speaking.

“We have always trusted one another. If there is any part of you capable of understanding this, you need to think rationally. There are millions of lives at stake. We cannot afford any mistakes right now. We suspect that there is something hidden, and we need to be alert, ready to move at a moment’s notice.”

“Touching speech, you old fox. Of them all, you are the one I most admired. If you really want to help me, you can keep all of those idiots off of my back. I’ve got things to do.”

Sousuke yawned again. He was growing tired of the conversation.

“Sergeant. You’ve always been an exemplary soldier, following your orders no matter what the risk. I command you to regain control. I insist that you follow the mission plan. I can only hope that something inside of you will respond as normal.”

“Et tu, old man? Enough chatter. This is the last you will hear from me. If you want to see your goals met along with mine, I strongly suggest that you continue to feed me intelligence reports. It will keep you useful. You need me. I don’t necessarily need you.”

He switched his attention to the A.I.

“Al, turn the music up again. Inform me when any tactical data comes in.”

“Yes, Sergeant.”

“Al.”

“Sergeant?”

“Input a change in programming. From now on you will refer to me as ‘Lord Sagara,’ not ‘Sergeant.’ Is that understood?”

“Working…. nomenclature accepted… affirmative, Lord Sagara.”

Sousuke focused his attention on the missile looming ever larger in his view screen. He smiled. This would be satisfying.